Stop being a weenie!

Many times over the past year and a half I have taken a moment to realize how blessed I am. How amazing it is that we live here. Then the magic sort of vanishes for a few weeks or months and I start becoming a complaining weenie. For example: I have no dishwasher...woe is me. No washer and dryer and I have to share with my neighbors. Annoying. I have no backyard for my kids to go play on their own. So we have to go all the way to the park one street over to let them run their energy off. Lame. I hate living in a small apartment- I can't keep it clean mostly because of complaints one and two. Doing just the basics all moms do takes a lot longer! But on days like today, when I had 45 minutes of quiet time to myself to just think and take it all in...I was reminded how blessed I am. That 45 minutes was spent driving along the coast of Southern California on our way home from the San Diego Zoo.  There wasn't any bad traffic (a miracle in and of itself and something I was very grateful for) and the kids were wiped out from a fun filled day so I just coasted along glancing over at the ocean every now and then. I started feeling overwhelmed with gratitude and also guilt for the times I'm anything other than grateful.  I live in a place people write songs about. I never have to deal with snow. I live a walk from the beach. I live within walking distance of two really awesome parks. I can see the ocean from my kitchen window and my patio even if it is a small apartment. And the fact that I have a smaller living space means I get stir crazy sometimes a LOT and have motivation to take my kids outside and around our amazing area to have adventures. My kids love just going to Target because one of their favorite parks is across the street.  There are literally like 5 parks we love in San Clemente. And even more in the surrounding towns that aren't far.  We live an hour from Sea World and the zoo and 40 minutes from Disneyland. We are near 2 beautiful temples. Our church building overlooks the ocean and is a beautiful building!

We have made our lives here work on an income that would probably shock all of you. I honestly don't know how it all works out in the end- I just know a lot of that is because we pay our tithing and have faith that things will all be ok in the end. And this week was ROUGH because we had some stupid expenses that we shouldn't have had.  But guess what? Ben got a promotion and raise that just kicked in this month and we had more than enough to cover those extra annoyances. And how can I complain when I think of how cheap our rent is and that we have had extra to be able to have Disney passes, zoo passes, Sea world tickets and have taken the kids to Legoland? We have made this last year and a half one of the best- it's been full of fun and excitement. And the initial obsession I had when we first moved here has faded- but not all the way. It just takes days like today to remind me how blessed I am. I am relishing these days with my kids being little. Sometimes I feel like I do too much and make life too exciting. But guess what? I only get one shot at this parenting thing and those outings and excitement are what make the normal days bearable! Our apartment is messy 95% of the time. But hey- we are living our lives and these tiny little people are surrounded by happy, fun things. Their room might be crowded because they all share and I crammed a train table in there for them to enjoy- but do you think they care? I love how close they are all going to be and how much fun they already have together. Right now they are all laying on blankets on the living room floor watching a movie together. Felicity is CHOOSING to hang out by her brothers even though they terrorize her most of the time. She giggles and smiles so big when she sees them in the mornings! I am living my dream. These kids are my dream come true! And while I think I'm crazy sometimes for subjecting myself to the stress of toting 3 small kids around by myself and I don't always have the most patience- it's all worth it when I see their faces taking in things for the first time, or enjoying them all over again after the 100th time.  I love my kids the way all good parents do. I wonder how I'm so lucky to have 3 happy healthy kids and pray with all my heart they always stay that way.

That's my big fat emotional spill for the day! I hope to blog more regularly- I only stopped years ago because my blog was too full of pics and I had to start another blog. So here's to hoping I can be more diligent and capture more of our memories in words and not just instagram pictures! :)